Thursday, January 04, 2018

In which the pond recites the catechism with dashing Donners ...


That was it, done and dusted. 

The pond's course for the day was settled. 

The lizard Oz had wheeled out the heavy hitters, and the pond was compelled, impelled, to follow. 

Few understand or fully comprehend the enormous personal sacrifices that arise for the pond when its day is decided in such an early and peremptory fashion. 

There's simply no time to pay attention to the new Malcolm Roberts on the block, one Jim Molan, given the standard reptile build-up of a column, and an EXCLUSIVE story about the column ...


Sheesh, they're such a predictable bunch.

There's little doubt the retired military commander is going to bore the socks off everyone in the coming year as he mounts his soap box, but hark, isn't that the siren call of the dashing Donners?

There's simply no time to pay attention to the race-baiting of the mutton Dutton, in full, awesome flight ...


There's no time to join The Times in fixing Iran, just as the west once really fixed it with its support of the Shah ...


Can we also seize the chance to fix Britain? No, better to leave it to Brexit off into oblivion ...

And matters Trumpian must be put on hold, because Donners is calling ...

 

Oh perhaps just a little of the Donald because it's so delicious, as recorded in the NY Times here ...

Hmm, the pond must cut back on the Donald candy, it's too delicious and filling, and nausea is the only reliable outcome after a binge ...

Now the pond can detect a certain fear and loathing ... could dashing Donners possibly match up to this level of incendiary bile, and general narcissist paranoid aggression?

O ye of little faith. How could anyone doubt the dashing Donners? 

The pond has little choice but to call them out by their rightful names - either nullfidians or possibly doubters infested with petty fidianism (follow the link if this makes no sense, ye petty fidians).

Look at the google tease, and be reassured in your piety and faith ...


Yes you've read it all before, a zillion times or more, as Donners does his best cracked record, broken clock impression (though with the hands lost, he can't even manage political or horological correctness twice a day).

It always takes the pond back to that dim time when in the classroom students were regularly herded off to mass, and on return the nuns required hapless possums reveal their ability to recite by rote, word-perfect, a mindless catechism involving assorted beliefs about imaginary chums.

In the usual way of the full to overflowing internet there's an illustration of the book the pond learned by rote here, together with sundry thoughts on growing up Catholic:


Oh happy mindless days of being a parrot, yet the pond does confess that it brings a wry ironical smile to the face to listen to another parrot blather about the imposition of a politically correct or possibly theologically correct agenda:


Strange, nowhere in dashing Donner's copious writing, is there any mention or reference to the reality that some aspects of Catholic history and cultural and educational practices might be questionable. Nor is there any mention of the brown envelopes the pond's parents felt compelled to stuff with coins and precious folding notes at a time when they were extremely poor. 

It was part of a giant Ponzi scheme which resulted in the ineffable display of wealth that can still be seen in St Peters and its assorted triumphal displays in assorted surrounding galleries and museums and churches... 

The pond still has fond memories of a visit to one of them, with its glittering golden ceiling, though what Christ would have made of it is another matter ...


Oh yes, it was a much better scam than being made to work for sugar, tea, flour and tobacco, and no wages on land you'd been dispossessed from, subsequent to the soon to be celebrated invasion day ... followed by a couple of centuries of barbs about being lazy, uppity, difficult blacks ...

Oh dear, dashing Donners has set the pond off again, so perhaps it's best to get on with the next gobbet, and frankly if the catechism doesn't mention the likes of Gramsci and Althusser, the pond will be terribly disappointed...



You see, o ye of little faith? Dashing Donners once again shows a comprehensive capacity for cluelessness and an equal capacity for monotonous repetition which would satisfy even the most pedantic of nuns as they listen to the recital of the catechism ...

And now, since the pond cunningly slipped in a reference to the Donald, there's an excuse to deliver a flurry of cartoons ...








2 comments:

  1. But we must mark him down for not mentioning the revolutionary work "How to Read Donald Duck" by Ariel Dorfman, which radicalised many small children.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Old Jimmy Moylan, in the Senate and prattling on about more money for the military, especially for retired generals who are double dipping on their penson with a Senator's salary and perks.
    Jimmy the would be military dictator. I never thought I'd see the day when I wished Fiona Nash, a National was back in the Senate.
    If his army career is anything to go on, old Jimmy will be flat out seeing what allowances he can claim stopping him from making too much of a fool of himself. It took a regiment of army pay clerks to process Jimmy's claims.

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