Wednesday, August 31, 2016

In which the pond shows some respect for the cynical wretches destined to spend eternity roasting in hellfire ...




Talk about agitation. 

The reptiles can sense that the chance of a decent bout of poofter bashing - all done in a terribly polite way of course, a proper and circumspect and civilised debate - might be slipping away ... so this day the digital edition is full of concerned citizens ...

And all this after Cory's done such hard work clearing the decks so that anyone might be able to insult and offend in style without fear of the law!


Indeed, indeed. Bloody racists ...

Already the angry Sydney Anglicans have been emboldened and stepped out to do a little photo bombing ...


Now the pond is all for a civil and tolerant discussion.

If you're a homosexual and you commit homosexual acts, you're destined to a roasting in hellfire for all eternity for your abominable crimes and that's that.  

Oh sure, you can water it down and step around it how you like and extend forgiveness and understanding, but if you do it, just remember you're damned ...

Now don't go fudging. It's a life of virginal chastity, or hellfire ...


Indeed, indeed. A homo! Oh okay, maybe that's a Calamity Jane joke here, but where there's smoke there's a lot of angry Anglican fire ... so cop this instead from the real David Ould ...


Indeed, indeed, and a lot more here,  and now that's cleared up, it's off to hell with you, yes you, you bloody heretics and splitters and homos and dissident complimentary women ...

And now let's get a good solid angry Anglican contribution to the debate ...


Yes, it's a pretty pass when Keysar Trad and the Sydney Anglicans line up together, and no doubt we can look forward to the angry Sydney Anglicans adopting some of Saudi Arabia's stern but just rules when it comes to dealing with the outrageous behaviour of complimentary women ... how dare the uppity things want to drive, or even worse, speak up in church. Be silent, you provocative hussies ...

But note the cunning tactic. 

It's all tainted, it's all too hard, and worse, we won't be able to point out that they're all due in hell pretty soon, and even worse, some of the reptiles are looking at the thoughts of the photo bomber, which litter the intertubes and show angry Sydney Anglicans at their finest and most forgiving ...


Okay, there must be some way to shut down the debate. 

Hmm, what better way than to wheel in the portentous, insufferably pompous nattering Ned Kelly, a sure-fire guaranteed way to get everyone nodding off to sleep in a nano second ...


By golly, that's a jolly jape, and sssh, not a word how the onion muncher made marriage equality and the plebiscite a tactical weapon. Instead let's have a witty reptile illustration ...


Oh dear, the pond can sense the one remaining reader nodding off, or perhaps tiptoeing away, and that talk of euphoria resulting in the sort of microsleep drivers are warned about all the time ...

Perhaps a Rowe could help eyeballs stay alert ... and more Rowe here ...


Okay, if the pond could just summarise proceedings to this point, for those who came in late to the story. 

Angry Anglicans simply want to point out, in a caring, measured and calm debate, that poofters are wicked sinners off to hell, and assorted deviates are attempting to ruin the fun and end the debate before it's even begun, and before hordes of angry Anglicans can photo bomb politicians, and nattering Ned is taking a firm stand on the matter ... 

Now read on, brave solitary reader ...


Okay, there's an obvious question here. Is this why the reptiles' business plan sees them papering airport lounges around the country? Because there's no way to make money out of Ned's natterings, might as well give him away, to keep up the circulation figures ...

Even worse, it's around this point in pursuit of endless, relentless tedium that the pond usually likes to revert and remind the solitary reader of nattering Ned's previous hysterical contributions, and not so long ago at that ...


There's oodles more of course of alarm and hysteria and pandering to the churches, and strangely, it always comes into the pond's mind whenever Ned begins to muse about strange contradictions ... and so to the final gobbet in today's offering ...


Yes, yes, it's a bad precedent and there are strong and valid arguments against it, but let's face it, how else are angry Sydney Anglicans and fundamentalist Islamics and evangelicals going to be able to get together, and patiently and calmly explain that homosexuals are off to an eternity of hellfire, and also, alarmingly, might well miss out on the 72 virgins ... and even worse Malware might not be able to keep on rolling out his futuristic copper based solution to Australia's urgent broadband needs.

Or some such thing, but right now, the pond urgently needs a Pope cartoon to slake its thirst, and more Popery here, thankfully of a non-Vatican, bigot-free Kandy Man kind ...







3 comments:

  1. Oh dear, on and on it goes, goats and sex

    ReplyDelete
  2. Perhaps these self-righteous Anglicans who are predicting that the sky will fall on us if any changes are made to the "natural order of things" should point to Roger Herft as a role model of applied moral integrity. And to the Newcastle Diocese too. And to Ballarat in the case of the "catholics".

    ReplyDelete
  3. The Americans fought a revolution over no taxation without representation.
    Sadly the Vicar and the rest of his religious crew get away with over representation and no taxation.

    ReplyDelete

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